Thursday, October 20, 2005
Randy Moss Wants About 5 Bags Of Chips And Some Weed
Oakland Raiders wide receiver Randy Moss, who suffered rib and groin injuries during Sunday's game against the San Diego Chargers, demanded "large quantities of medicinal marijuana and a couple bags of chips" from his team doctor, sources said yesterday.
"Make that about five bags of chips," Moss said. "The good weed really gets my snack groove on."
"Make that about five bags of chips," Moss said. "The good weed really gets my snack groove on."
An anonymous NFL official said Moss "smokes the ganja about as frequently as he smokes defensive backs...we have a real problem on our hands here."
"If this medicinal stuff is weaker than the original, my doctor better give me a huge amount," Moss said. "I've found two suitcases full usually does the trick."
"Mr. Moss is trying to manipulate the NFL drug policy with his evil designs," said NFL commissioner Paul Tagliabue.
"Dude don't know what he's talking about," Moss said in response. "I mean, I leave the Minnesota Vikings and they end up turning a cruise ship into Caligula's summer home. Go figure, man."
posted by Perkoff at 6:31 PM