Saturday, September 30, 2006

Click the image below to make it larger so you can actually read the words and stuff. I'll give you a little backround information. I was in the principals office for some reason, I was waiting in there for the principal to come in, I saw a stack of papers with the school logo on top but no words on the paper. So I stole a few dozen sheets. This is one of the notes I printed out, I was going to send it to my friends house but realized his dad would prolly beat the shit out of him if I did, so being a nice guy, I didn't send it.

posted by Perkoff at 8:11 PM | link | 6 comments

Friday, September 29, 2006

Blue Blockers

Man I like my blue blockers.

posted by Perkoff at 8:20 PM | link | 0 comments

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Look What I Found At Work

Ok, I live in AMERICA, you know the USA. I don't live in Japan or China, so why am I finding crazy ass shit with Chinese or Japanese writing on it?



Anyone out there have any idea what this is?
posted by Perkoff at 8:25 PM | link | 1 comments

Saturday, September 23, 2006

Crocodile Dunperkoff

I was taking a poop and I felt something biting my ass cheeks, I jumped up and discovered something I never expected to find in my toilet bowl.

posted by Perkoff at 3:19 PM | link | 3 comments

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

They're Coming To Get Me

I'm going fucking crazy because the aliens are coming to get me.

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posted by Perkoff at 8:10 PM | link | 3 comments

Monday, September 18, 2006

Best Gift You've Ever Got?

The best gift I ever got would have to be the gift of life. I didn't ask for it, I just got it. And if I didn't get it, I wouldn't be here today.
posted by Perkoff at 10:14 PM | link | 3 comments

Sunday, September 17, 2006

My Second Skate Video

Yesterday I made a skate video without any skateboards, today I made one with skateboards.

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posted by Perkoff at 7:14 PM | link | 4 comments

Saturday, September 16, 2006

The Skate Video

Don't even need a skateboard to make a skate video.

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posted by Perkoff at 11:59 PM | link | 3 comments

Thursday, September 14, 2006

Jump Around

I jump up, jump up and get down, I jump around, jump around.

posted by Perkoff at 10:03 PM | link | 2 comments

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Promote My Website

Hey guys, any of you in school and you have those announcements in the morning at your school? One day when you're the one doing the announcements you should say "Perkoff.com"

Also, you guys ever ride down the street and have more than one person in the car? Person in the passenger seat, if you drive past some people roll down the window stick your head out the window and and yell "Perkoff.com".

Hey guys with boards at work you can post shit on, why not get a thumbtack, a piece of paper, a marker and write down "Perkoff.com" on the paper, than use the thumbtack to stick the piece of paper on the thing at work you can post shit on.

Guys on tv or radio shows, why not say the name of my website "Perkoff.com" on your tv or radio show?

Guys that like to get tattoos and show them off, why not get one that says "Perkoff.com"?


Well, any other way you can promote my site would be great.
posted by Perkoff at 10:45 PM | link | 2 comments

The Breakfast Scramble

I scramble to get breakfast and some pretty interesting things happen along the way, I'd tell you what those things are, but I really don't want to ruin the surprise.

posted by Perkoff at 9:11 PM | link | 1 comments

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

It's Raining Pretty Hard

It was raining hard and I had to go put my wet clothes in the dryer.

posted by Perkoff at 6:48 PM | link | 2 comments

Monday, September 11, 2006

Perkoff Rules

Email me pictures of yourself holding up a sign that says "Perkoff Rules"

Thanks.
posted by Perkoff at 11:07 PM | link | 0 comments

Sunday, September 10, 2006

My Parents Like To Write Notes

My parents are really into writing notes on sticky pads.

posted by Perkoff at 8:13 PM | link | 0 comments

My Brother In A Jean Jacket

A few weeks ago it was summer, now it's cold as the opposite of hell outside, I don't know where the hell my brother got this jean jacket from.

posted by Perkoff at 7:33 PM | link | 2 comments

Saturday, September 09, 2006

My Brother Missed Out On The Good Food

You know how I got my brother on hidden camera freaking out a few times because my mom never buys any good food like she used to? Yeah, she finally bought something good and I ate it all.

posted by Perkoff at 11:59 PM | link | 2 comments

Friday, September 08, 2006

The More You Know

Back when I used to watch Saturday Morning cartoons they had these really cool "The More You Know" comercials. I decided to make one of my own. I combed my hair over my eyes and shot in a dim condition to keep my identity a secret.



The More You Know
posted by Perkoff at 7:48 PM | link | 2 comments

Super Mario Perkoff

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posted by Perkoff at 12:10 AM | link | 3 comments

Thursday, September 07, 2006

The Future Is Going To Be The End Of The World

A half-mile below the surface of the New Mexico desert, the federal government is interring thousands of tons of monstrously dangerous leftovers from its nuclear weapons program --plutonium-infested clothing, tools and chemical sludge that will remain potentially lethal for thousands of years to come.

Perkoff-It seems that they are burying nuclear waste instead of doing my idea. What's my idea? Send it into outer space. The only reason I think this hasn't happened is because we probably already tried and the aliens probably gave us shit about it, probably said something like

Aliens-"Hey man, we live up here in outerspace, and we use magnets for energy, not nuclear shit, why don't you bury that shit on your own planet, we don't want that in outer space. You send anymore up here and we're gonna flood your world again and make you start over, this time we'll trick some other sucker named Noah into thinking we're god and building an ark."

Wired News: Future Be Warned: Keep Out!
posted by Perkoff at 6:40 PM | link | 2 comments

Do You Believe In Perkoff?

Some crazy guy wrote this about me.

Do you believe in Perkoff?

There I had to get that question out of the way.

Perkoff does NOT exist. Perkoff is some sort of corporate created
series of videos created like the Al Gore's Penguin Army video, as
propoganda for globalism (and corporate power's messages). If you have
these Perkoff videos, you see ones that refer to an empty refrigerator
(eat more, buy more), stuff on Peewee Herman (you need your retro
stuff. In other words, buy once more the stuff you used to have but
threw out), one video with a burgler (making you be scared, so you buy
a security system, and fear terrorists so you accept your civil
liberties being eroded), and also one with a camera hidden that was
found (both to make people scared they are being spied on, so they need
identity protection, and also security systems for their spy
equipment). And this lastest one with Freddy Kruger is used to promote
treatment for people fighting their nightmares. All of this is to get
you to buy buy buy, and accept the New World Order!

It is all a mass plot by the powers pushing globalism I tell you. The
said "Perkoff person", is not an actually person, but is actually a
corporate marketing team doing this, this is why you never see the
face. Perkoff is a codename for a team pushing the accepting of
globalism and other agendas multinational corporations want you accept.
Very soon, you will see strategic placed product endorsements in
Perkoff's videos, such as a Starbucks cup. Perkoff will rant about a
single item, and you will swallow it down, and then find yourself
having a subconscious impulse to go get large quanitites of this item.
It will be the Perkoff Blipverts at work. The shill team will be using
subliminal advertising to get you to buy buy buy!

Fight the Perkoff! Down with this shilling for globalism!

This message does not necessarily reflect the views of its writer...
- Richard Hutnik
posted by Perkoff at 5:59 PM | link | 0 comments

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

What Do You Likebetter?

likebetter.com

Likebetter is a game where you can choose between two photos. Click on the one you like better.

Keep an eye on the brain, when it turns pink, it 'knows' something new about you.
posted by Perkoff at 7:10 PM | link | 0 comments

Monday, September 04, 2006

What The Hell Are These Things Called?



I was just watching The Simpsons and after that, That 70's Show came on. Eric(a character on That 70's Show) was sitting on the couch playing with what is pictured above. I typed in magnet wheel toy in the google images search engine and the picture above came up.

What is the official name for these things? I want to order one, I used to have one when I was a kid.
posted by Perkoff at 6:33 PM | link | 3 comments

Riding Dirty

I was riding dirty when a cop got behind me. I got 05 tags on my car. Luckily the mother fucker was too busy trying to find a donut shop or somethng, he didn't even notice my expired tags.


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posted by Perkoff at 1:16 AM | link | 4 comments

Sunday, September 03, 2006

Perkoff Is A Big Dog

That's right.

posted by Perkoff at 5:46 PM | link | 4 comments

Not Again, The Cam Burglar!!

The Cam Burglar, not to be confused with
The Hamburglar

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posted by Perkoff at 4:29 AM | link | 1 comments

Saturday, September 02, 2006

Freddy's Back

Freddy Kruger is back, and he seems to be pissed off, he sounds really pissed off.

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posted by Perkoff at 8:49 PM | link | 4 comments

Perkoff's Bloopers And Practical Jokes

Here is a blooper from My Parents Are Out Of Town.

posted by Perkoff at 5:00 AM | link | 1 comments

Friday, September 01, 2006

My Parents Are Out Of Town

My parents left me $20 to buy food with while they are gone, check out what I bought with the money instead of food.

posted by Perkoff at 5:00 PM | link | 2 comments